Quincy Poetry
by Chimamire Ichigo
Summary: Ichigo's distracted and has a problem while in class, it's all because of the Quincy, will his hollow help him or hinder him with his problem. Implied yaoi, gender-bender, and cross-dressing.


QUINCY POETRY

Disclaimer; I do not own Bleach and make no profit what-so-ever from this fic!

Warnings; This Story is rated T for foul language; thoughts influenced by adolescent hormones, a crazy inner hollow, and implied boy-x-boy. If you don't like it then stop reading the story and close the page.

Dedication; This story is dedicated to Crazed-by-Penguins and my friends from KuroNekoCon.

Author's Notes; *Is sitting in a computer chair spinning lazily in circles* Thank you all for reading this story, and sorry to all the readers from my other story 'secrets', it will be a while yet until I'm able to post the next chapter to it. *Stands up quickly, sending her chair rolling away and poses in a 'Sailor Moon' victory pose* But fear not! I shall not abandon any of my stories! *falls into a defeated position and sweat drops* I just had to write this story because the plot bunnies for it wouldn't leave me alone. *goes to sit down but misses the chair* Oof! _ . . .TvT Please be kind and review dear readers! As for flames, *points over to box with a plot bunny peeking out of it* They shall be used as lining for 'their' boxes.

~/~/~/~/~

"**Bleach"** is Shiro, Ichigo's inner hollow, talking.

'_Bleach'_ is thinking, or Ichigo talking to Shiro.

"Bleach" is regular talking

~/~/~/~/~

Oh Graceful Quincy!

Thousands of arrows flying,

Your enemy falls!

~/~/~/~/~

He couldn't help it, for the past few days he has caught himself staring at the Quincy. Taking in the profile of the Quincy's features from across the class room. From the softly pointed chin and high cheek bones, to the narrow and sharp, yet button nose, to the short blue/black hair that just reaches the collar of the Quincy's always crisp and clean school uniform. He wonders if the hair would feel as soft and silky as it looks.

'_Shit!' _He's doing it again, Ichigo couldn't help himself. Letting out a frustrated huff he turns back to listen to Ochi Sensei's (1) lecture on proper grammar when writing traditional Japanese Poetry. Taking notes on what Ochi Sensei says about the proper form for a Haiku and a Tonka and then attempting to write a simple Haiku on the whiteboard herself, she instruct them to write one as well and turn it in before the end of class. Picking up his pencil, Ichigo begins to write the first thing that came to his mind.

Long legs and white skirts

Quick arrows and nimble hands

Beautiful and proud

Ichigo slumps into his desk, hiding his face behind his notebook. He can't believe he just wrote that. It makes him sound just like Kyoraku-Taichou spouting his undying love to Ise-Fukutaichou for the millionth time. (2) Pathetic, he likes girls for kami's sake not boys! Especially a prideful, smartass, attractive Quincy with long legs and a cute ass!

"**Wouldn't mind havin' a piece of that cute Quincy ass myself King!' **

'_Shut the hell up you damn hollow!' _Ichigo can hear Shiro laughing in the back of his mind after that comment. _'Uryu is a guy! I'm not into guys!'_

"**Well, that Quincy can pass for a girl," **Shiro comments while holding back his laughter **"What, with that girly face and slim figure, he even has interest in such girly things."**

'_He doesn't have a girly face; it's just effeminate. And what interests, his sewing?' _ Ichigo rolls his eyes, _'Sewing isn't girly.'_

"**Sure it's not, when ya don't use lace and ribbons and only do it to repair somethin'. Not sew skirts and hand stitch lace and blue crosses onto things."**(3)Ichigo sees the image of Shiro pointing, **"Hell, he wears a skirt when he fights hollows.**** (4)**** Look at what he's sewin' now between listenin' to that bag of wind an' takin' notes."**

Ichigo hadn't realized that he had been looking toward Uryu again until Shiro had pointed out what Uryu was doing. Seeing something that was white in his lap, Ichigo figured it could have been Uryu's Quincy's 'Whites'.(5) As Uryu finished writing in his notebook, he picks up the cloth to work on whatever he was working on, Ichigo spots the bit of lace with blue ribbon running through it on the cloth. He won't disagree with Shiro about Uryu wearing skirts when he wears his supposed 'Quincy Whites', but he will argue about the item said Quincy was sewing.

'_It's probably not his, he works on things for all the girls of the class all the time.'_(6)

"**Oh, you think so king? When was the last time you seen one of 'the girls' ask Uryu to sew for them, Hmm?"** Shiro snorts and Ichigo gets the image of Shiro crossing his arms. **"And look at those hands! Those are hands that belong to a girl!" **

Ichigo watches as Uryu quickly threads a needle and begins sewing the cloth in his lap and can't help but notice how slim and narrow Uryu's hands are and how delicate his fingers are. He couldn't agree more with Shiro that Uryu's hands look like they belong to a girls, much less think of how they would feel as they slowly rub across his chest while his own hand slowly feel their way around the Quincy's hips to feel that cute and tight ass hidden under the Quincy's skirt that are a part of his whites…._'Gah! Dammit!' _Ichigo feels like he needs to beat his head against a hard surface, but refrains from doing so as it would cause his classmates to think he's really lost it.(7)

Shiro lets lose another bout of laughter at Ichigo's predicament. **"Admit it king, ya got the hots for the Quincy! I certainly do!"**

'_I do not have the hots for Uryu Isida! I could never have the hots for another guy!' _Ichigo tears out the paper with the haiku he wrote on it and stuffs it into his book bag, _'Especially for someone like Uryu, end of story.' _Picking up his pencil, Ichigo starts writing out a new haiku.

"'**He' certainly don't look or act like a guy most of the time king, I think 'he' might really be a 'she' in hidin'. Hell, that midget of a monster Hiyori acts more like a guy then 'he' does.****(8)**** If it weren't for the fact she wore pink and had pigtails you could mistake that midget for a guy." **

'_True, but Hiyori is a freak.' _ Ichigo states, _'And you shouldn't compare freaks to normal people."_

"**Who are you to say who's normal and who's not? Normal people don't fight hollows on a daily basis or talk to themselves while writin' love poems King." **

'_I never said I was normal bastard, and I am not writing love poems!'_

"**Certainly looks like a love poem to me King."**

Ichigo glances down at his note book and can't help but to turn beet red as he hears his hollow's laughter.

Beautiful Quincy,

Blue hair shining in the sun,

Arrows pierce thy heart.

'_Stop laughing you bastard,' _Tearing out the page and stuffing into his book bag alongside the last page, Ichigo takes a deep breath to calm himself down.

"**Alright king, don't get your panties in a twist. Though ya didn't deny my point of the Quincy really bein' a girl in disguise."**

'_That's impossible; I know for a fact Uryu is a guy.' _

"**Oh really? Ya ever see 'im changin' for PE?"**

'_Well, no. He doesn't take PE.' _

"**Have ya ever seen 'im in any state of undress?"**

'_No...' _

"**How about using the bathroom?"**

'_Why the hell would I watch him use the bathroom?'_

"**Have ya?"**

'_No!'_ Ichigo begins to frown as Shiro's line of questioning forces him to think about the lack of evidence against Shiro's opinion.

"**How about feelin' 'im up?"** Shiro's grin was apparent in the way he spoke. **"I know your fantasies about touchin' the Quincy in such manners."**

'_Gah! NO! What the hell Shiro?'_ Ichigo buried his face into his notebook trying not to blush as red as the fruit everyone called him. _'And how the fuck do you know that shit!'_

"**Not like your thoughts are as private as you think they are King. After all, I'm a part of your soul and basically live in your mind. I know all your dirty little fantasies involvin' the Quincy."**

'_The Fucking Hell Shiro! My thoughts are fucking private!'_

** "BWAH HA HA HA! You aren't denyin' you had those thoughts about the Quincy though. HA HA HA! And why the hell would I bother lookin' at your stupid fantasies King? "**

_'Fucking hollow, I'm going to kill you.'_ Ichigo practically growls and ends up snapping his pencil in half, stabbing himself in the hand with the broken shards of wood. "Kuso!" He curses quietly. _'I'm going to kill you in the most painful and humiliating way possible.'_

**"Sure king, whatever you say. But ya know, checkin' out the packagin' might just help solve your problems. "**

'_You have got to be joking me Shiro!'_ Ichigo had to restrain his jaw from dropping at Shiro's comment, _'I can't believe you would even suggest that!'_

"**No joke king, but ya know I'm right." **

_'I won't ever admit that you're right about anything,'_ Ichigo sent a mental scowl toward Shiro in his mind while fishing out a new pencil from his bag. _'And what exactly are my 'problems' that you think I have Shiro?'_

**"Oh King,"** Shiro let out an exasperated sigh before sending Ichigo an image of him shrugging his shoulders and shaking his head. **"There are so many, where would I even begin to start." **

'_Fuck you Shiro.'_

"**Yeah yeah, King, maybe later when we won't get interrupted." **

'_SHIRO!'_ Ichigo's second pencil ends up snapping under the pressure of his combined anger and mortification toward his hollow. _'One more time Shiro and I'm coming in and ripping you a new one.'_

"**Alright King. I was just playin, I'll behave now." **Shiro holds his hands up in surrender.

Reaching into his book bag for the second time in a row for a new pencil, Ichigo crams the two broken pencils into his bag next to the two poems and pulls out a pen and begins to write a new haiku with it. _'Yeah right, you'll behave when Hat-and-Clogs __(9)__ stops being so mysterious and manipulative all at once and Goat face __(10)__ actually finds his sanity.'_

'…_**Like that will ever happen!'**_ both Ichigo and Shiro state together.

Hana Kōsui,

Soyokaze no Haru.

Kisetsu Kokan. (11)

Giving the Haiku a once over, Ichigo nods his head in approval and writes his name atop the page before he takes it to the front of the class to turn it in and returns to his seat.

"**How pretty, though I like your other two poems and think ya should've turned one of those in."** Said Shiro.

'_Shut up Shiro. I swear you enjoy embarrassing me.' _

"**It does brighten my day. Besides annoyin' you and tryin' to get Zangetsu off that damn flag pole ****(12)**** and actually do somethin', I've nothin' else to do."**

Resting his head across his arms on top of his desk, Ichigo lets out a sigh. _'You're such a pain in the ass Shiro, what the hell am I supposed to do with you?'_

"**There are plenty of things ya can do with me King," **Ichigo buried his head farther into his arms and suppresses a groan at the smugness emitting from his hollow. **"But until ya solve your problem with the Quincy, I'm going to keep givin' ya hell for it."**

'_That's it! As soon as class is over I'm coming in there and using you to clean the windows__ (13)__!'_

"**Wouldn't ya rather spend that time solving your little 'Quincy Problem' king?" **

'_And what would you suggest I do, and how, to solve my 'little Quincy Problem' as you are calling it?'_

"**First ya gotta admit to bein' bi King." **

'_Easier said than done, Shiro.' _

"**Then answer a few questions for me."**

'_Alright, shoot.' _

"**I'm your hollow, but I'm basically a reflection of your soul, right?"**

'_. . . Yeah, just a cruder, more brash, and feral reflection of me .'_

"**Basically, a hollow version of you, right?"**

'_Yeah, I suppose so.'_

"**An' which way would ya say I swing?"**

'_With all the perverted comments in the past 20 minutes coming from you about both Uryu and myself, I'd say at least bi."_

"**Correct ya' are King." **Ichigo could tell Shiro was attempting to tone down the sarcasm in his reply, but Shiro couldn't hide his smugness when he asked the next question. "**I'm bi, an' I'm a hollow version of you, right?"**

'_A-alright,' _Ichigo stuttered out, _'so what if I am bi, admitting it now doesn't help with my 'Quincy Problem'. _

"**It does help king! Means it doesn't matter whether the Quincy is a guy or a gal, you just got'ta admit you like the Quincy."**

'_And if I did, it still wouldn't answer the question on Uryuu's gender. Nor make it easier to actually admitting my feelings for him.'_

"**Well that's an easy answer, man up and confront 'im about 'is gender. After you get that issue out of the way it should be easier for you to admit your feelin's to the Quincy." **

'_Sorry Shiro, but gotta turn down your idea of confronting Uryu about it.' Ichigo Grimaces, 'I don't feel like becoming a living pincushion.' _

"**I'm not sayin' to state our thoughts on the issue directly to the Quincy about 'is gender, more like statin' the fact that 'he's' hidin' somethin' and that ya know what it is. From 'his' reactions ya can either state the obvious than or prolong it and get 'im' to admit that 'he' is actually a 'she'."**

'_I'd rather not accuse him of being a girl and end up as a living target for him to practice with if we're wrong.'_

"**Then get the Quincy to admit it!" **

'_And if he won't admit it?'_

"**Then we go with plan b!" **The cockiness emitting from Shiro just made Ichigo want to raise an eyebrow.

'_And what is plan b exactly?' _

"**You grope 'im."**

'_I'm doomed.' _Ichigo muffles a groan into his arm.

"**Why ya sayin that King? With either of the plans ya solve the debate of the Quincy's gender and get a chance to express some of your feelin's for 'im."**

'_As I said, I'm doomed'_

~/~/~/~/~

Authour's Notes; I know, I'm evil for leaving it there, but; 2180 words! Woot! The plot bunnies can't complain about that! That's a better 1st chapter then my other story. Here's a few notes for those readers who aren't as familiar with Bleach as I am and some odd little tidbits I have to comment on.

1) Misato Ochi Sensei is actually the name of Ichigo's homeroom teacher according to Bleach Official Character Book Souls, she teaches Japanese.

2) This Sentence is for you Darling-Corinna! ~_~

3) A reference to when Uryu 'repairs' Kon after Kon's ear gets torn off. Found in the Bleach manga volume 21, chapter 184.

4) A friend told me that they're battle kilts and not skirts. . . I still think a skirt is a skirt no matter what you call them.

5) Quincy 'Whites'. . . What else would I call his Quincy Outfits! They're always white!

6) Uryu actually fixed a doll for Michiru Ogawa, one of Ichigo's And Uryu's classmates. I don't remember what manga chapter it was in though.

7) . . . Like he hasn't already lost it, what with dealing with his Dad, Kisuke, and with certain short shinigami.

8) Hiyori rocks! If I was short, I would so cosplay as her!

9) Urahara Kisuke

10) Kurosaki Isshin (whenever I lose my sanity I check under my manga shelf)

11) A cookie to any reviewers who can translate Ichigo's final Haiku

12) Zangetsu and the Flag Pole. . . most of the times Zangetsu is seen, it seems he is always standing on top of it

13) I would have used 'mop the floor with your ass' but the 'Floor' in Ichigo's inner world/mind is made up of windows, thus I said what I said.

Again, Thanks for reading and please review! ~Chimamire Ichigo


End file.
